it may sting a little...

For all you men that are reading this blog, I must warn you that this may get graphic and you will be grossed out (or turned on if thats your thing).

Today's calls were boring and very.... short. Lets just say I might make more money if I was a homeless chick on the side of the road waiting for someone to donate $1 to my sign that would read "Help, I'm drunk". It was a slow and boring day and all the dispatchers were tired and bored themselves. Every time one of the dispatchers gave me a call, it sounded like they wanted to pass out.

About 30 mins before I wanted to log out from work and start to enjoy my life, I get a call from a guy that is looking for a strict Dominatrix. No biggie, since I love doing dominatrix calls and just tell the idiot what to do. I get on the phone with this guy and he tells me "I have some toys with me. I have an 8 inch dildo, two rubber bands, two nipple clamps, one leather whip, one wooden paddle, two Q-tips and a bottle of hot sauce." (It gets better) So I tell him go ahead and wrap those two rubber bands together and wrap it around his cock and balls TWICE! He does so. Then I tell him to take one side of the rubber band and SNAP it as hard as he can against his balls. He does so. He screams. I tell him to do it again, he does. He screams. Then I tell him to take that rubber dildo and... well you know.

I do a little torturing and spanking on his ass for nearly 10 mins and he keeps wanting it more and more. SO I tell him to go ahead and spank his balls with the wooden paddle. He does so. He screams harder and he counts every time he gets spanked. He says "ONE, oh thank you mistress, TWO, oh thank you mistress, THREE, oh thank you mistress" over and over and over until he reaches to 20. Then comes the Q-tips. I tell him to get those q-tips and cover them with the hot sauce, both sides, and shove it down his Pee-hole. He does so, he screams.

This goes on for nearly 25 mins. He then asks me "Mistress, can we have two mistresses please?" I tell him "ok, you've been good, yes you can have two mistresses if you want. BUT, when you call back, you MUST tell the dispatcher that you are a pathetic little shit and tell her EVERYTHING that I've done to you." He agrees and hangs up.

Minutes go by and the phone rings. I hear the dispatcher laughing so hard, I can barley hear what she is saying. She says to me "Oh wow, you are GOOD! Q-TIPS?? WOW!" and continues laughing. She gets another girl to come on the line with me so now there are two girls taking to this guy. I tell her everything that she needs to know and to help me torture this guy. Every time I tell her something that I've done, I can hear her giggling and trying her hardest not to laugh. At first the other girl seemed shy (or hiding her face in the pillow laughing) and once in a while, she tells him to do something naughty, such as spank his balls with the leather whip. He does so, he screams. Then I tell him to pull out the dildo from his ass and pour hot sauce directly into his asshole, shove the dildo back in and twist the dildo. He does so, he screams. I tell him to go and get TWO q-tips and discard the one he's already using and to put hot sauce directly down his pee-hole and then shove TWO of the Q-tips down his pee-hole. He does so, he screams louder. The other PSO tells him to take the nipple clamps and clip them inside his pee-hole and pull. Once he begins to scream, I tell him to pour hot sauce down his pee hole where the nipple clamps are. Me and the other PSO start laughing and we cannot hold it in this time.

This conversations continues for nearly an hour with me and the other PSO. He then tells me "Mistress, I want to call you back and cum for you" and I say "DO YOU DESERVE TO FUCKING CUM YOU SHIT?" and he says "I hope I do." So I tell him if he calls me back, he MUST tell ANOTHER dispatcher everything that me and the other PSO have done to him. We hang up and surely enough, my phone rings again. I pick it up and it's the other dispatcher (there are only two working today) and she starts laughing. I'm probably thinking she was in tears laughing. She says "Holy shit! You put HOT SAUCE down his pee-hole? AND Q-TIPS??" and we begin to laugh together. I asked her if that caller made her day and she said "Hell yes it did!!! Good god! I have no idea how these men think it's sexy to pour HOT SAUCE down your penis hole."

Nothing happened after that other than him finishing up his... guilty pleasures. ;-) Now THAT is what I call torture.

Have a good day!

Wheelchair of Fun!

I'm BACK!!! I haven't written in this blog for nearly... A long time. I can't remember when the last time I wrote in here. Well, I'm back with some new stories to tell and I can't wait to share it with everyone.

As you all know, I keep this anonymous for myself and for my own clients. I will not disclose any personal information since it might jeopardize my job.

Anyway, I wanted to share with you a fun and exciting client that has a thing for wheelchairs. Yes, Wheelchairs. When the dispatcher gave me the call, the first thing she said was "your going to love this call". I'm thinking in my head, 'oh no, probably another crazy one', and it sure was. This man loves women sitting in Wheelchairs. Oh wait, Chubby girls that SMOKE and are in wheelchairs. As I started talking to this guy, he kept asking me questions about my wheelchair and if it's manual or auto. Once I tell him manual, he lets out a loud moan. Then he asks again, "Is it a sporty wheelchair?". I have no idea what that means so I say "yes". He lets out another loud moan. Then he says "If I were to pick you up, how can I do so?". I start to thinking my head as fast as I can how he can pick me up if I was paralyzed and say "I would wrap my arms around you and hold on". He then finishes his... 'stuff' and hangs up.

I love it when weird calls come in. I have a lot more stories to publish so keep checking back to this blog!

Just a note...

There are a few callers that I hate talking to, and there are the ones that end up being memorable which I share those stories in my blog. This past week has been a slow week and my pay check is showing it. Since today is one of those slow days, I might as well tell you a few things what I like about certain callers and what I dislike about the callers. (if any other phone sex operators are reading this, let me know if any of these situation happens with you)

I love fantasies. The bigger the fantasy, the better. It gives us a chance to be creative with our imagination. The only way I can understand if the fantasy is turning them on or not is the way they react to little sentences that I say. Every caller thinks they have a unique fantasy. Sometimes they tell me "Well I don't know if you've ever done this before, but my fantasy is....." Trust me when I say this, but all the fantasies that I have heard doesn't really surprise me anymore. I have done them all. If not once, then at least 5 times. Some fantasies are crazy and some are very private. All fetishes have different catagories, but at the end, they are all the same.

Another thing that I love is when the callers are talkative. They don't necessarily need to have a fantasy, but with an outgoing attitude, it's so much easier to talk to them. Normally I can tell which type of caller they are going to be by the first words with "Hello". Either it is "Why Hello there!" with the loud and cheerful voice. Those seem to be easier to talk to and I'm not afraid to ask questions to keep the conversation going. I can ask them a single question and their answers are normally a short story. It gives me an opportunity to get to know the caller and try to work with it. Some other callers respond weird. I can hear them breathing heavily and following with "ohhh umm, hello", which means they have been working at it for quite some time and I'm only going to talk to them for a min or so. I start to ask myself the question "Why do you call if your already having fun?" Then there is the shy ones that say "umm, hi.. I've never done this before" - which means 'I am addicted to sex and I don't know how to talk to women'. Those are the ones that get under my skin. The ones that do not know how to talk to me. If I ask them a question, they will simple respond "yes" or "no" with no further details. It's really hard to do ALL the work when they won't work with you. I remember having this one caller making me do all the work for him and all I was doing was moaning and saying "ohh yah, thats the spot", but I honestly didn't know if it was turning him on or not. So I finally said "Ok, common... please work with me here... what the fuck do you want?". Even after that, he still didn't tell me what he liked.

Getting Caught.... One of the biggest things that I love about some of these callers, is hearing their wives on the other line and surprising their husbands. For example, the caller I just had.... His wife came home expectingly and the last thing I heard before he hung up was his wifes voice saying "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" This actually happens a lot. I basically get these callers once a week. I had a caller last month where he was getting into the conversation, I hear his breathing getting faster and faster as if he's about to cum, and then I hear a door open on his side of the receiver and he begins to talk to me as if I was his best friend. He says "ohhh thats feels good.. ohh god,, ohhh yes.... ohhh ohhhhhhhhh.... Shit, Well then Dan, I just have to give you a call back about that fishing trip. Okie then, I'll talk to you soon." and he hangs up. You cannot imagine how hard I was laughing after that call. He never called me back after that.

I hope I made you smile!

Don't tickle me there.

I apologies for being away from my blog for so long. I hear from a lot of you that you enjoy reading my blogs, and I love hearing all the responses from some of these posts that I put up on here. Yes this is a crazy job... Not the typical 9 to 5 if you ask me. lol

Well I have another stupid, crazy caller that calls me about once a week, and every time I hear his name, I shiver. First of all, I don't like having this caller, but he is so easy to talk too, it's hard for me to be mean to him to stop him from calling me. This caller loves to hear girls giggle and laugh, and he thinks he's causing us to laugh because he's telling us to rub our legs up and down until we feel ticklish. I know he talks to the other girls because we sometimes talk about how much we hate this guy. He can last for hours, which is a GREAT thing for us. More money in our pockets. But, since he's so boring to talk to, it makes one single minute seem like 30 mins. The way he talks to us is like Jeffrey Dahmer talking to us about how much he wants to tickle our toes and our belly buttons. Ohhh... the BELLY BUTTON! That's a must for this guy. For some reason, he LOVES talking about how he wants to stick his finger inside our belly button and rub it all around. When I talked to him yesterday, he talked about my belly button for 10 mins non-stop and how much he wants to stick Q-tips inside it and rub it all around until it tickles. I don't know if he has ever stuck his finger inside his own belly button, but it's not a pleasant feeling, and it does NOT tickle. This caller hardly ever talks sexual to me, and I do believe he gets off by talking about my belly button. When he asks me "does that tickle?" I always respond with, "Ohhh HEE HEE, of COURSE it tickles." and he would tell me "Well I want to hear you scream out laughing." So, I will begin to start laughing really loud, but in the back of my mind, I'm thinking "I'm laughing because this guy is making me insane!" He ends up enjoying it and I end up hating him more and more. Like I said, it's not the usual 9 to 5 job. lol

I will try to post more blogs in the near future. I get crazy callers everyday and I get emails from everyone asking to post more. Until then....

The Rule of Thumb

When callers have fantasy's or fetishes, the conversation seems to be easier for me to work with.

Today I had a caller with a small fetish of rulers. For some reason, he said every time he sees a ruler, he gets aroused. For a while I was giggling because I thought this was a joke, but apparently not. He was laughing back and saying "Whats so funny?". Thats how I knew it wasn't a joke. He likes it when women take a ruler and measure EVERY inch of his penis, including the width. He wanted me to ask him questions about his penis and where he should measure his cock. I honestly don't know if he told me the truth about how big it is, because he gave me two different numbers on just on length. Oh well.

The call I had after that weird call was also interesting. Both calls were only 5 mins long, so thats why I don't have a lot of the details like I normally do. Anyway, the next caller had a fantasy of his mother's big ass. He was telling me that he LOVES his mother's big fat ass. When I asked him how big was his mother's ass, he told me his mother's waist size was 56 inches, so I'm assuming it's a really large ass. He said he loves to watch her wash the dishes and watch it bounce up and down and jiggle. He also told me when she's scrubbing the bath tub and she's bending over, he loves watching her and fantasizes on slapping his mother's ass. Then, while he's playing with himself, he's moaning out "mommy, yes mommy.... oh mommy".

I wish I was making some of these stories up, but I'm not. It's a slow day today, but I hope you find these stories interesting. I know I do.

The Doctor Tom Special.

I get a lot of callers asking for me to be a cheerleader, and I can understand the fantasy since a lot of the pornos use the slutty cheerleader characters. About three minutes ago, I got a call from work asking if I can be a slutty cheerleader. Of course I said yes, since this is only a fantasy and all. At first, the dispatcher was laughing before she read me his name and his information. She told me I would get a kick out of this caller since he likes to create weird fantasies. Once she said this, I thought to myself "Well I better pay attention so I can blog about it".
She told me that this caller wants a young 19 yr old slutty cheerleader that loves to play with toys and is obsessed with Latex clothing. (Are you saying "What the fuck" yet? I know I was at that moment.) After laughing with the dispatcher for a few seconds, I began to talk to him. He was a nice guy, nice to talk to and had a nice attitude. He told me to call him Dr. Tom, so I did. This is his Story....

"I want to be your Gynecologist, so please call me Doctor Tom. First, I want you to come into my office and sit on the table and let me examine you." Then he makes these noises as if he's using the tools and actually examining me. "Wow you look very healthy and I must say, you have fantastic legs. Are you a Cheerleader by any chance?" and I answer "yes". He goes on "Wow thats wonderful. Why don't you call some of your cheerleader friends and tell them to come in the office so we can have a slumber party here and they can all get tested at the same time." (I swear to you, I am NOT making this up) He continues, "Now that we have some of your friends and some of my nurses in my office, I would like to test all of your friends. You can let them know that his procedure is called the 'Doctor Tom Special'. What makes this procedure so special is that I will be inseminating special eggs that are fertile inside your womb and we will pass them around to each one of the girls, including you, and all the girls will have a baby growing inside of them. Then, once you are 6 months pregnant, we will take out the baby from your womb and place it into an incubator until it is fully developed. That way your body does not stretch too much. I want you to stay small and thin for me. Then, we will teach the baby to grow up as a lesbian so once she is old enough to play with other women, she can come and teach you how to become a lesbian as well. Also, since she will be a lesbian, she will have a lot of lesbian friends and we can invite them over for sleepovers."

That was the end of his call because his time ran out and he couldn't afford more minutes with me. I was actually sad to have the story end, but I was also thankful because the second that call ended, I started laughing hysterically. The way he was talking to me about this story was nonchalant. He was talking to me as if he was a little boy, trying to tell Santa what he wanted for Christmas. These stories amaze me and I wonder where these men get their fantasies.

the ones that I hate are more memorable than the ones that I love

I HATE this asshole. I have a client that goes around to different girls and talks to them about his small problems. All of the dispatchers know him and hate him just as much as I hate this guy. He likes to call and tell us that he has his girlfriends nieces (two of them) laying in the bed with him and he gave them "rape drugs" so the girls are sleeping and passed out. Then he tells us that these girls like to play around with his penis (it is REQUIRED for us to say Penis to him. NOT cock or dick. It's pronounced as PENIS). This is the same caller that I mentioned earlier about having a couple of girls putting make up on his penis. Yes, this is the SAME caller.
Anyhow, the reason why I hate dealing with him is because he talks like he's a professional killer and he's ready to attack these two girls. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if the police called the service asking questions about him and the police needed to talk to all the girls that he has spoken with. He normally likes to extend his minutes with me, only because I tell him that I will not judge him. He keeps asking me over and over "Am I being recorded? I don't want to be recorded." and I would ask him "why? what did you do?" and he would say "because I like to play with little girls." The way he says it... it gives me chills down my spine. If you have ever seen the movie The Cell with Jennifer Lopez and Vincent D'Onofrio. Vincent D'Onofrio's character in that movie is a REALLY scary freak that loves to cut up women and fantasize about them in weird ways. Well, If you've seen that movie, then you know what I'm talking about. This caller is JUST like that freak in the movie and thats what scares me. Once you say the WRONG word with this caller, he gets mad and yells at us. He will correct us by screaming at us saying "YOUR NOT SUPPOSE TO SAY THAT! THATS NOT THE RIGHT WORD!"
Honestly, I would rather take the craziest domination call that would last for an hour than to have this fucker calling me for only 5 minutes. He is sick and twisted and he needs to be banned from the service.